


Mutual Friends

by 2Atoms



Category: RuPaul's Drag Race RPF
Genre: Enemies to Friends, F/F, Light Angst, hate!fic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-06
Updated: 2018-11-06
Packaged: 2019-08-19 21:21:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,713
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16542473
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/2Atoms/pseuds/2Atoms
Summary: Trixie's friends make her hang out with Katya. Everyone else loves her, but Trixie has a bone to pick.





	Mutual Friends

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rainbowsarecool](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rainbowsarecool/gifts).



> for astoldbyacertifiedunicorn on tumblr <3 - i wish I could follow prompts right  
> (might follow up with the 'sexual tension' element, that you asked for)

“I wouldn’t have come if you’d told me she would be here.”

“That’s why we didn’t tell you, duh.”

Trixie groaned, internally cursing her friends. All three of them were still loitering by the door, so she could probably sneak out, but these were _her_ friends. It was a party for _her_ best friend Kim. She couldn’t believe they’d betray her by inviting _Katya._

Katya was a hanger-on. A leftover from one of Adore’s many short-lived flings. In true U-Haul lesbian fashion, Katya had been invited to meet all of her friends one month in to their relationship, one month before they broke up.

But Katya kept coming to events, some traitor would always invite her, or pick her up on the way. All of Trixie’s friends were obsessed with this weird, loud, chain-smoking woman, so Trixie just had to put up with it. Not that it stopped her complaining.

Barely an hour into the party, standing with Pearl and Kim, Trixie was still watching Katya like a hawk. With every one of their mutual friends she makes laugh, every sip from her coke can, she was irritating Trixie. It felt like a personal attack, the way all Trixie people she loves also love Katya. Her stomach was clenched with anger, and Trixie took deep sips from her white wine glass, straining to hear what Katya could possibly be saying to entertain Violet _that_ much. It took a while, but eventually Kim noticed how Trixie wasn’t not paying attention to their current conversation – lamenting the long hours of their respective jobs – and turned her head to follow the hard line of Trixie’s stare. Kim sighed, when she saw Trixie had, indeed, been watching Katya. She cocked a hip as she turned back around, clearing her throat to get Trixie’s attention.

“Why do you hate her so much?”

Kim wasn’t exactly quiet, and Katya heard. She left her conversation, fixing Trixie with a piercing look from behind Kim’s head. There was a challenge in her eyes, and Trixie wasn’t about to back down.

“She reeks of smoke, for starters,” Trixie sneered, watching Katya’s face for any display of hurt.

Katya snorted a silent laugh, before pretending to smell her own arm, mock gagging. Oh, so she was a clown. Trixie restrained a laugh, schooling her face into a frown. Kim was totally unaware of the additional person listening to their conversation, too busy tutting disapprovingly at her friend.

“Adore smokes.” Pearl pointed out, surprising Trixie. She looks completely unengaged in the conversation.

“True,” Kim laughed, “that’s not an excuse.”

Trixie could see Katya in her peripheral vision, raising her eyebrows and not bothering to conceal a shit-eating grin. Trixie was sweating from discomfort, and Katya could tell. She fumbled for another excuse.

“Right, well… she’s… loud.”

Kim and Pearl roared laughter, Kim gripped on to Trixie’s forearm to try and stay upright, almost spilling her drink.

“ _Loud?_ Trixie, you’re the loudest person I know! And Katya’s anxious, like, half the time. I can’t believe you.”

Pearl nodded in agreement, and Katya’s smile faltered a little. Trixie tried to bat away her guilt, holding onto the anger she’d felt a few minutes ago.

“I can’t believe you two. You know I don’t like her! What about when she broke up with Adore! Then, you still wanted her to hang around. Did you even think about how Adore must feel?  Having her ex around all the time?”

She couldn’t look back at Katya, Trixie tried to pretend she wasn’t within earshot and focused on the two women in front of her instead. Except, they didn’t look impressed with her either. Pearl was rolling her eyes, and Kim just gave her a pitying look.

“They weren’t like that, Trix. It was a mutual end to the relationship. Adore invites her to everything, they’re like best friends now. She’s funny and kind and I don’t know what your issue is!”

Pearl nodded, talking over Kim to interject.

“Every time you don’t show up to something, ‘cos she’s there, Katya offers to leave.”

“She gets upset that you don’t like her, and none of us know why you’re being such a bitch to her! Honestly, you don’t get to choose who our friends are. Get over yourself, Trixie. You’re making everything harder for literally no reason.”

Kim went a little red in the face during her speech, and Trixie felt her eyes prick with tears. It was embarrassing, being torn down like this in the middle of a party. She secretly hoped Katya had stopped listening, but she knew that was impossible. And now she had to deal with the consequences of being so horrible to this woman, for literally no reason. Shit.

“I don’t know…” Trixie formulated her words carefully, blinking rapidly to clear her vision, avoiding looking at Katya. “She’s funnier and smarter than me, and I can’t always keep up with what you guys are talking about. Remember when _I_ was the _out-there_ one?”

Trixie tried to laugh, but Kim and Pearl just looked at her sadly, silencing her. Katya shifted behind them, closer to the group as she was jostled around by other partygoers. Trixie noticed they were getting glances from their other friends.

“You’re jealous?” Pearl deadpanned, muffled by the drink in front of her face.

Trixie panicked, her cheeks burning red. She felt acutely aware that Katya could still hear her. Trixie didn’t want to admit she had been wrong, but lying hadn’t served her too well so far.

“I guess… it feels like you’re replacing me. With her. And it hurts. Like, a lot.”

 She stared down at her white pumps. She’d felt so excited pulling them on, shedding the work week and spending an evening with her favourite people in the world. Except now Katya was here and now her friends knew she was a terrible person. Awful. Pearl vocalised her thoughts exactly.

“You’re fucked in the head, Mattel.”

Kim laughs, and Trixie just stands there, trying to force a smile onto her face. There’s pure, hot shame in her gut and a tightness in her chest. Katya hadn’t moved away yet, she was just giving Trixie a steady, evocative look. It’s supposed to mean something to her, Trixie supposed. Pearl finished off her bottle of cheap beer, looking around at the other partygoers for the next person who’s façade she can dissemble. Kim still looked concerned for Trixie, placing a hand on her arm. It was probably meant to be comforting, so Trixie tried not to flinch at the contact.

“You two would probably get on really well, y’know. If you’d give her a chance.” Kim’s sincerity was too intense, too much for this Friday night. Pearl broke up the heavy atmosphere, with yet another phenomenal observation.

“I reckon you just have a crush, and you’re just being childish about it.”

Trixie stuttered, shocked by Kim’s believing reaction as much as Pearl’s statement. She felt her face flushing even further. The pink tinge on her skin was undoubtedly creeping past her foundation line, onto her neck where Pearl and Kim and _Katya_ could see.

“A crush? Really? Have you seen the awful clothes she wears? That cheap makeup? No way in hell.”

Kim and Pearl raised their eyebrows, but it was Katya’s reaction that got Trixie’s attention. She gasped, pressing a hand to her chest dramatically, miming an arrow to the heart. Fuck. Trixie let out a full blown laugh, drawing bemused looks from the friends around them. It make Pearl and Kim look around the room, confused.

When they saw Katya, the both women faltered. She was blatantly within hearing distance, and she gave an awkward little wave as the realisation hit both Kim and Pearl. They offered her twin uncomfortable smiles before stammering out that they needed to get more drinks, and even Pearl looked shaken. Katya let them go gracefully, with a gentle and understanding smile. It was annoyingly kind-hearted, and Trixie didn’t know what to do. She frozen like a deer in headlights as Katya approached her.

“They should put some music on in here. It’s a bit too easy to hear.”

“I… know. I’m sorry.”

People were still watching them. It was small gathering, and the room was near-silent as conversations were put on pause. Katya gestured towards the house’s screen back door. 

“I need a smoke. You coming?”

Trixie nodded meekly, unsure of herself now that their silence game was up. The things she’d said were echoing around her head, repeating and taunting her. And now she had to own up to it. She followed Katya out the door, and Katya closed it behind them. The outside light blinked on, and Katya pulled a pack of cigarettes out of a pocket. She offered one to Trixie, who declined, before lighting it. Trixie looked away, out into the night, and Katya took her first drag. It was easy to picture shapes in the dark night, in the clouds and the smog that covered the city.

“Do you really feel threatened by me?” Katya’s voice was a little raspy, and even though she exhaled away from Trixie, the smell of smoke still reached her.

“It’s stupid, I know. But, yeah.”

“I’m sorry.” Katya sounded completely sincere, no trace of sarcasm in her voice, and it make Trixie feel even worse. She stared up at the sky, away from Katya, as she spoke.

“You shouldn’t be. It’s just that… I grew up really rural, in the middle of nowhere, and these are the first friends I’ve had who really knew me for _me._ Y’know? It’s hard not being the new, exciting person in the group.”

“That sucks.”

“Yeah, but its also not a reason to take it out on you.”

Katya’s eyes were wide with shock. Her face was so, so expressive, near-impossible to misread. Trixie could smell the smoke on her breath.

“You’re right.”

“I really thought you hated me.” Katya’s voice was thick and raspy, either from emotion or the smoking, Trixie couldn’t tell.

“So did I. I… sort of didn’t realise what the problem was… until earlier. Everything I thought was wrong, it was all in my head. I’m really sorry.”

“I get it if you don’t want me to hang around you anymore. I understand. I can go.”

“Don’t be stupid, you don’t have to go anywhere. Not when I’m finally getting to talk to you!”

Katya finished her cigarette, dropping the butt on the ground and squashing it out with the chunky heel of her boot. She offered the box to Trixie again, before lighting her second cigarette.

“Where did you grow up?”

“Backwoods Wisconsin. It sucked.”

“I can imagine. When did you move here?”

Trixie took a deep breath, bracing herself before she replied.

“Well, I left Wisconsin when I was seventeen, for college. I was the youngest in my year. But I hated it, never actually made it through the first term, and moved to L.A.. Then I started working for Kim’s mom instead.”

Katya nodded. Trixie knew their friends had probably told Katya a lot of the story already, but it was still nice that Katya wanted to hear it directly.

“I haven’t met Kim’s mom yet, but everyone keeps telling me about her. She sounds great.”

Trixie nodded.

“She’s like, an _actual_ mom to me. And a lot of the other girls.”

“A loving mother to all dykes.” Katya added, and Trixie glared at her. “That’s why she’s kinda adopted all of you, isn’t it?”

Trixie sighed, conceding.

“Yeah, if you like. She said she’d walk me down the aisle, if I ever asked her to.”

The night was cold, even after a balmy California day. Trixie shivered a little.

“That’s amazing. I’m glad you’ve got someone like that, Trixie.”

 “A mom? Or a wife? ‘Cos I definitely don’t have a wife.” Trixie laughed, trying to get rid of the heavy atmosphere surrounding their conversation. Katya wasn’t having it.

“Someone to look out for you. I can’t even imagine how tough it must be for your actual mom to suck.”

“She’s just old fashioned, I guess.”

“That’s not an excuse.”

“Yeah.” There was a pause in the conversation, while Katya lit her third cigarette.

“What about you? I mean, I know you dated Adore, and all. What’s the rest of your story?”

“‘Dated’ is one way to put it.” Katya smirked, blowing smoke upwards. There was a cheeky look on her face, illuminated by the crappy deck lighting, and Trixie couldn’t help smiling back.

“Adore’s great.”

Katya hummed in agreement, taking another drag from her cigarette.

“She is... and she really loves you, y’know?” Katya’s voice was so sincere, so honest, Trixie couldn’t stand to look at her.  

“I know. I’m lucky. It’s great that you two are still friends…” Trixie tried to think of a tangent to go on, a way move their conversation away from Katya’s ex, but the shorter woman was already talking.

“The others all love you, too. I hope you know that. They care about you so much. And they all pretended otherwise, but it really bothered everyone when you stopped meeting up with them. It put me in a really difficult situation.”

Trixie looked up at her in shock, and Katya’s face was dead serious. Her cigarette was burned all the way to the end, glowing red hot right next to her fingers. When she finally noticed, Katya swore and threw it on the ground, using her foot to extinguish it. Trixie was speechless.

“Sorry, it’s just hard to make new friends when you’re accidentally pushing someone else away.”

Trixie couldn’t detect any malice or anger in her voice, just disappointment, maybe some slight passive aggression.

“I’m sorry.”

Katya grins, and it’s the wide, ecstatic smile Trixie used to hate so much. Now she knows that it’s sincere, that Katya’s not faking it, or being sarcastic, Trixie can’t help but smile back. She’s so happy, just because Trixie gave her a crappy, bare minimum apology, Trixie can’t understand what she found to dislike.

“I really am sorry. I was petty and stupid and jealous, I thought you were just there to replace me, so I took it out on you. I acted like a stupid kid, and I’m sorry, Katya.”

Those big, caring eyes are staring Trixie down, almost watering. She goes in for a hug, and Trixie doesn’t have time to get away, so she just leans into it. Katya’s arms are strong and wrapped tightly around her, and it’s so all-encompassing that Trixie exhales deeply, breathing back in with the smell of smoke. It usually would have bothered her, but Trixie didn’t really care. She’s relaxed and busy letting go of all the malice that she’d been carrying towards Katya, secretly terrified that Katya didn’t like her too, and even though the party is still going on inside it feels a million miles away.

Katya has one last cigarette after they break apart, and Trixie stays and chats to her, even though she’s shivering from the cold and coughing from the smoke. When they finally go back inside, Kim is huddled in a corner with Dela, and every pair of eyes in the room is fixed on the two women. Katya waves jokingly, easily re-joining a conversation with Violet and Adore, and Trixie is left to fend for herself, uncomfortable under the scrutiny of their friends.

She skulks towards Kim, grimacing a bit from embarrassment. It’s obvious everyone else knew what was going on, that Trixie was _finally_ talking to Katya. Maybe they had been watching them through the windows, waiting for a screaming match, even a fight. Trixie sighed, nodding at Dela in greeting, before whispering to Kim. People had finally started talking amongst themselves again, and Trixie looked around before she whispered to Kim.

“I apologised.”

Kim squealed, and Dela gave her an encouraging smile.

“…and?”

Trixie groaned. Her friends knew her too well.

“You can never tell her, but Pearl was right. I do like her. A lot.”

She knew Katya couldn’t possibly hear her, all the way across the room, but when she looked up Katya was staring, like she knew too.

Unbelievably, Trixie was glad she’d come. She wouldn’t be missing any more parties.


End file.
